How to use my four pillars to heal from grief

by | Oct 20, 2020 | Emotional Pillar

Grief is hard, especially when you feel stuck in it. Hear how I lead my patients (and myself) through this emotional season.

Hello, hello.

Today, we’re going to talk about a subject that is, ugh, it’s a hard one, but it’s what happens when we are getting really stuck in grief.

Maybe there is an incredible reason, like we’ve lost somebody we love dearly, maybe an event crisis in life hasn’t gone exactly the way we’ve wanted it to go, and we’re grieving a moment. Maybe there’s a divorce or maybe there’s a break-up.

There’s so many things that are occurring in our life that just can be heavy. And if you don’t really have a support system in place or maybe have really been taught how to deal with these hard emotions, then that can settle into our body. And it can settle into our processes every day, our mind, and it can start to weigh us down both mentally and physically. So when we talk about this, one of the things that I always do, I’m always applying the four pillars to whatever you bring to me. I’m always putting those back into the four pillars.


And a lot of times, we will go, well, how is environment grief? I don’t understand that. And in that, you’ve got to expand out your vision of what the environment is. What are you doing in your home? Are you taking care of yourself? Are you getting the house cleaned? Are you able to clean the house? When I start to see people who are losing that self-care, then we know something is getting real serious. We’ve got to have an intervention.

Also, environment is who are you surrounding yourself with. Are you surrounding yourself with people that are lifting you up, that are giving you solutions, or are they keeping you kind of in that sad and hard spot? And sometimes, especially if there’s a loss, you’re surrounding yourself by family, and everybody’s in that same stuck spot. So that can be very, very difficult as well.


Then we’ve got the nutritional component. Whenever our body is dealing with something hard, no matter what it is, that is the time that the food has to be extremely clean. And what I find many times is this is where the community will step in, and they’ll start bringing food, and then all of a sudden, you’re eating things that you don’t normally eat because you’ve chosen a cleaner path and not realizing that this food that you’ve reintroduced back in because it’s easy is actually a major component of your depression. And I’ve seen that happen so many times. So as hard as it is, sometimes you have to say, I appreciate that you’re helping me, but I’ve got to have it this way. And again, standing up for yourself in a hard time is difficult, but I really encourage you to do it.

Then we’ve got to look at nutritionally. Again, sometimes we need that extra support. There have been times in my life where I have needed that extra support, and I’ve looked at herbals, and I’ve looked at vitamins. And I’m talking about the foods that support the mineral basis in my body, because when we’re in high-stress times, we’re going to burn our minerals so fast and we need to replenish those at a much higher rate than what people really, really think about. And so having that depletion of minerals and not having those herbs on hand, again, we can get stuck in repetitive thinking.


And the big part about grief emotionally is it gets lodged in the lungs. We have a difficult time breathing. Sometimes we can come down with some physiological conditions like asthmas and pneumonias and illnesses that settle into the lungs. And it’s because we’ve just stopped breathing. So, doing deep, deep breathing exercises is integral in these times. Being able to use essential oils that open up our pathways, go deep into our lungs is going to be really integral at this point too.

So, if you’re able to incorporate these and you still find yourself in trouble, please reach out. It’s one of the things that I’ve been there. I’ve been on that path. And I know how to help. Talk to you soon. Bye-bye.

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